Tuesday, March 31, 2009

.cut the crap.

i need to lose some weight. seriously. i HAVE to. cant be like this. i hope there's still time. i really have to do this. ASAP.


Wednesday, March 25, 2009

.let me fly to the blue sky.

i wanna go away from this state of being.
i wanna go away for weeks, months, years.
i wanna go away in the state of confusion.


.i procrastinate.

the assignment is two weeks overdue. i still have no idea how to do it. damn. days by days nak buat tapi tend to procrastinate. sangat malas nak berfikir. at times terfikir jugak why doing masters now. pastu terfikir balik, sebab keje memaksa aku untuk menyambung pelajaran. sangat penat. class ended early today because the students wanted to do the work i gave them at the library. the construction site near the class sangat mengganggu pembelajaran tadi. so went to have lunch with Pijat who still seemed worried and confused of the condition of her new relationship.

after lunch pulang ke rumah dengan hati yang sangat berat memikirkan terlalu banyak perkara. tapi cuba memandang ringan dan melakukan apa yang sepatutnya. so, baju dalam washing machine dijemur, siram pokok pokok ku yang kehausan air, cuci lantai porch and cuci pinggan.

sitting on the sofa. mengadap laptop. about to start doing the assignment but still cant figure out how. huh. camne ek. gile pening.

maybe later.

so, started to bloggin', facebook-ing and YM-ing.

and Cooking Dash-ing =)

procrastination. as usual.

Monday, March 23, 2009

.and i love him more.

encikluzd came to KL and we had a great weekend. did some shopping for the day which the date hasnt been decided yet. most shops were on really big sale so we managed to saved a lot. it was tiring but we had no choice due to limitation of time. alhamdullillah, the things-to-buy were bought as according to the plans =) though it was really a hassle looking for some of his stuffs. aiseh.

anyway, it was fun. he has been very helpful and supportive though there were arguments but we cooled down fast so no major problems arose. and i love him more.

also, my family and i attended a cousin's wedding at Lake Titiwangsa on Sunday. brought encikluzd along and introduced him to some of the family members (my dad's side) and vice versa. he got along well with them. it was a relief!

Friday, March 13, 2009

.i need a break.

i am extremely exhausted today, physically and mentally. my whole body is aching and im having stomachache. still, there are too many things to think of. today's journey from Dungun to UKM Bangi was a hell. honestly, i was totally annoyed with what happened throughout the journey. while listening to the songs on my mp3 player, i slept. leaving the world behind me. i wanted to be in my own world where i can ultimately be myself and be happy.

anyway, i did enjoy my very-not-comfortable slumber.

*i need a massage. now.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

.when there are too many things to think of.

hari ini aku rasa macam nak kawen.

macam mana ek.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

.the saying goes 'no pain no gain'.

hari ini kecewa lagi. terlalu banyak keja and datelines. kehidupan yang terkejar kejar macam ni sangat memenatkan. people say no pain no gain but this is too much pain.

had three classes today. six painful hours of teaching. i hate complaining but i cant bear it anymore. at times i feel like quitting. work or masters. both mean so much to me and i need both to survive. keep reminding myself to hold on and be strong.

classes with the part two students today menambahkan lagi beban yang dipikul. these lately they are not being serious with the tasks given. geram betul. i need more time to prepare interesting materials so i'll be able to capture their interests. plus, mid semester exam is just around the corner. aku pulak yang takut if there are failures. shit. MORE TIME NEEDED.

aku kecewa. aku penat.

aku perlukan sesuatu.

.three blissful months.

so ive already been blissfully engaged to Mr. Dzul Azwardi Shah for 3 months.

hmm..and only yesterday and today i got to really spend some time with his family members. been really busy lately sampaikan takde masa nak jenguk jenguk them. huhu.

had really good time with them. still in the process of getting to know each other better. i didnt have any problems chillin' with them. in fact, i enjoyed every moment spent. they have always treated me well and there are times that i feel like cant hardly wait to be part of the happy family. aiseh.


Sunday, March 8, 2009

Jason Mraz

...You Rock!

it was a great performance.

we had so much fun despite what happened before the concert.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

.selamat pengantin baru.

congratulations to both of you, Jet & Shef

Monday, March 2, 2009

.shaifulrizal, aku mau jumpa kamu.

saat ini aku sangat rindukan dia.

dan aku rindukan masa masa bersamanya.

aku rindu senyum itu, tawa itu, jenaka itu,
aku rindu makan makan bersamanya,
aku rindu malam malam indah meronda kota raya sambil mendengar Jimmy Eat World, The Get Up Kids, New Amsterdam, Dewa, Michael Buble, Minda dan Blackpool Lights,
aku rindu mengikut nya ke mana sahaja dia mahu pergi,
aku rindu melepak di ofisnya,
aku rindu bowling bersamanya dan rakan rakan lain
aku rindu jalan jalan bersamanya

aku rindu kehadirannya saat ini.

aku mau jumpa dia.

tapi bila?